Happiness

Are you familiar with Abraham-Hicks writings, the movie The Secret , or any of the many other works on spiritually based manifestation methods? Even the first chapter of my book, Being Bliss, focuses on the laws of manifestation and how we can use spiritual wisdom to create the material enjoyments we believe will make us happy. Thereafter, my book focuses on other sources of happiness, but still, it does also cover materially based happiness and spiritual methods for manifesting the things we want.

Despite the reasonable desire to seek material well-being so long as we are sensorially experiencing life through a physical body, it is vitally important we understand that if we equate success in acquiring or achieving anything material with justification for happiness, we will never enjoy lasting peace.

Now many of us can hear this and instantly believe it at a theoretical level, but we'll still secretly hold the hopeful belief that acquiring certain things and situations will lead to happiness. That's why we're working at manifesting those things. We want to be happy.

Hard as it is to accept, the bottom line is, if we feel like what we have right now is not enough for us to be happy, no matter what we have or lack, we will be locked in a mentality of insufficiency and unhappiness. Additionally, if we justify our current happiness by looking at what we have materially, we are still taking refuge in something unreliable.

For example, it's fine to say "I'm grateful for a peaceful, beautiful home and health and good food," but what if there comes a time when you have none of those things? Then what do you say if you've already justified your happiness in those terms when you did have all that? So then you have to be clinging and trying to avoid loss even in good times, if you believe this is a world in which your happiness depends on having some condition or thing. Consequently, gratitude practice isn't enough to sustain peace.

The only thing one can take refuge in for lasting peace and contentment is the present moment as an experience, not an idea. Whatever you can find when you simply attend to the present moment, that's all you really have.

You may be hot, cold or just right in temperature. You may be in a quiet place or a noisy place. You may be alone or with people you either like or dislike. You may have debts or wealth. You may have a wonderful home you own on 2 acres by the sea or be staying in your family's living room. You may be healthy or in pain and fatigue. You can't control these things, though you can safely hold intentions about them. And time will either reveal those intentions come to pass by virtue of your efforts, or that they do not, regardless of your efforts. Either way, you only have this moment, whatever it contains, in which you can possibly find true reason for happiness.

The way I see it, that I have (or am) consciousness is the only reason I have to be happy. I am aware. That's the whole party. There is nothing else I get to keep. Either awareness is enough reason to be happy, or I'm shit out of luck no matter what happens.

So now, how does one shift to a belief system that says that consciousness all by itself really is enough for a person to be happy? It begins with giving up hope that any idea about happiness will ever cause happiness.

We can be amused, entertained, and enlivened by our ideas. Our ego can get a big boost of energy from the right ideas, ideas like: "I'm important, successful, and well-loved." "I'm financially secure," or even, "I'm rich." "I'm beautiful." All sounds great. Sign me up.

But even if I truly believe all these ideas, they still cannot cause actual happiness. How many successful, rich, beautiful young models do you know of who OD on drugs? I rest my case. Clearly these things do not cause happiness.

Happiness can exist in the presence of wealth or in its absence. Happiness can exist in the presence of beauty or in its absence. (Don't try to feed me any crap about "everyone is beautiful in their own way" either.) Happiness can exist in the presence or absence of even health, as challenging as that can be.

Happiness depends on our making the mental decision to drop all further decisions about whether we should or should not be happy.

When we decide that no matter what happens, we are going to joyfully embrace our experience of being alive and call that reason enough to be happy, we've made it. That's happiness, as it is found.

Keep your visions of grand homes, loving families and spectacular careers, or whatever else appeals to you. Definitely envision your health and vitality. Continually clarify those visions, gaining ever increasing understanding about what it is you want as you gain life experience that helps you make better and better choices. But do not base your happiness on the fulfillment of those visions. You may live this entire life with none of those visions ever manifesting in reality. That has to be good enough.

In order to make spiritual manifestation work something that truly blesses your life, you don't hold the hope that succeeding in making your vision real is going to give you a reason to finally be happy. You embrace happiness right now, but create the vision for the sheer joy of exercising your creative ability. It should be joyful when you are envisioning possible futures. That joy while you are envisioning is the payoff and creative force, and it happens while you are delighting in your present moment experience of being a conscious being who can imagine.

If you do this, over time many of your visions will manifest into physical form. That's just how energy works. But it doesn't work if you are grasping at it. It doesn't work if you are trying to make it work because you believe you need it to work in order to be happy. It is such a subtle difference, yet that slimmer of a divide keeps so many people from actually creating lives of joy for themselves.

You are a perfect, unlimited being who is fully abundant. You are all that exists. There is nothing apart from you and nothing you lack. Only when you allow yourself to feel the truth of this will you be satisfied.

Could the ocean ever be satisfied to live the life of a glass of water, no matter how big you made the glass? Nothing less than infinity will ever satisfy you, since you know in your heart that infinity is your true nature. So don't delay any longer. Isn't it time you rested in your true nature? Well then close your eyes and rest for a moment. This is It.

Update 9/14/09 - Comments have just been added to this blog, and this article can now accept reader comments.

Feed The Vampires, Please

I just had a startling revelation after reading a 100 page book (with about 20 pages of that illustrations) called The Ever-Transcending Spirit, by Toru Sato. I'm not into all his stuff about the evolution of consciousness (isn't one Wilber on Earth enough spiritual materialism), but I found invaluable information about dealing with energy vampires.

Basically you just let the people drink. The only thing wrong with people taking your energy is when it depletes your energy. If you aren't depleted, there is nothing wrong with it. The way not to be depleted is not by withdrawing, isolating, putting up walls or trying to steal energy back, but by recognizing that all energy anywhere is your energy. You are connected to such an unlimited supply of energy you can't possibly be depleted so long as you remain open and receptive to that infinite supply.

I even got to try it out when I was half way through reading the book. I went to the store and ran into someone who went off on a rant (which was meant to be helpful at his conscious level, but was definitely an energy raid at an unconscious level) and I allowed myself to tap into the energy around me instead of just relying on that contained within my body and energy field. Quickly I realized that the most energy around me was in him, because he was all worked up about what he was trying to convince me of, and so I let myself join with his energy.

This isn't the same as stealing it back because actually we both wound up getting really energized by the experience, as well as having a really intimate interaction. . I wasn't connecting with the energy of his separate energybody, but tapping into the infinite source within him which he was not feeling. His inability to feel his own endless supply of energy was the reason he was trying to steal my energy, and I simply allowed myself to be an energy channel for him, connecting him to a deeper experience of himself.

He could feel I was deeply listening to him, and indeed really "feeling" what he was saying with complete openness. He was visibly moved by the experience and I was bouncing on air and giggling I was so full of energy as he spoke. Once I felt I'd had enough of the interaction, after about 10 minutes, I began thanking him for sharing his insights with me. Once he felt his offering was duly appreciated we changed the subject and parted after a few more minutes with the deepest sense of connection I have ever shared with this person, who I have known for 4 years without ever feeling we were on the same wavelength.

According to Sato, people take our energy in a wide variety of ways, among them: endless talk-talk-talking, usually about themselves and their life's dramas; asking for help then disagreeing with all advice offered; painting themselves as a victim to invoke pity; passive aggressively inciting strong emotional responses with no concern about the ideas being shared and the sole intent of triggering the other person; criticism; pressuring someone to change their actions or beliefs to come into alignment with one's own; long meetings in which the power holder keeps everyone's attention focused on pleasing them; and expecting others to meet one's needs with no intent of reciprocally meeting the needs of the other person.

In any of these situations we always have a choice to resist the power grab, allow the power grab, or shape the situation into a power sharing one. When we resist we argue, ignore the person, energetically close ourselves off from them (which, over time, is exhausting) or get away from them (perhaps even isolating ourselves). When we allow we may feel drained, irritable, and resentful afterward, but we avoid our fears of confrontation or offending others and are able to continue in relationship, at least until we are too depleted to do so any longer. (When you are really depleted even vampires will tend to avoid you anyway, unconsciously fearing you will try to steal energy from them!)

When we shape the situation into something new using our own responses, not requiring anything different out of the other person, is when a win-win situation that is sustainable for any amount of time occurs. When we localize our sense of self to our limited body and energy field we have a limited supply, so must protect that supply or face depletion. But if we allow our self-awareness to be broad enough to take in the whole of our environment we find ourselves energy billionaires who can afford any amount of generosity required by the situation. After all, we aren't giving energy away, we're just allowing it to flow freely within us, as is the nature of energy.

I swear this is not just theory. I actually did this and if you give it a try I think you can do it too. It's best to start with someone who doesn't actually hate you. If the energy stealing is a direct act of violence that's a different situation. But most energy theft is not with ill-intent behind it. People don't even realize consciously that they are doing it. They see themselves as energy starved and so naturally reach out to sustain themselves using anyone around, like a person who can't swim trying to save himself from drowning by grabbing onto whoever is within arm's reach. If you let them pull you down with them they will, until they can grab onto the next person. But if you lift them up and let the ocean float you both, you both win. Whenever you tap into the energy all around you, including within them as they engage intensively in whatever behavior they are using to suck at your energy, you are effectively surrendering to the greater power of the mighty ocean which will indeed carry you both to both safety and freedom.

Overcoming one of existentialism's 4 primary "inescapable sufferings" of life, it turns out you don't actually have to choose between security and freedom, not if you can learn to be an infinite energy being instead of a separate, limited physical being. Build no walls around you. Dance freely in the light, breathing deep, and giving yourself fully to life with complete abandon. You will be sustained by all that is.

(As an aside, let me state that not all of these ideas are in Sato's book, but that his book contributed a crucial understanding that helped me apply other ideas I've been working with. For example, Sato doesn't make mention of how one is to connect with more energy by being open when someone is aggressively trying to take one's energy. He just assumes you will naturally do the additional steps that are needed to make this work, probably because he has already developed unconscious mastery of doing those things himself.

He also doesn't make mention of the fact that all energy is just energy, so we don't have to be afraid of allowing ourselves to connect with a person's energy when they are agitated. If they are trying to attack you, that's a little different, as you'd have to be nearly a buddha not to be affected negatively in such a situation, but again, most energy raids are not meant as attacks. Still the person might be very agitated within themselves and only by connecting with the energy of their true being and not writing a mental story that labels their energy expression as dangerous is it possible to make Sato's approach work.

It's as if the person is cut off from their own connection to the endless source of energy and you offer your energy body as a "reconnector." You channel their own energy back to them, so they fill up without taking anything from you.)

Update 9/14/09 - Comments have just been added to this blog, and this article can now accept reader comments.

The Free Flow of Energy

Here is an excerpt from a reply I sent to someone's message that I think is a good overview of what I have found in recent experiments with EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique):

"The EFT work wound up affecting me similarly, only regarding emotion. I see now that the EFT isn't really so effective because it moves energy along the meridians. It's more that the distraction of the tapping and the idea that energy is being safely moved to foster emotional health allows the person to be willing to "sit with" their emotions for the full ride. It is allowing the emotions to be and to naturally express themselves that is healing and the tapping is just a distraction, which I no longer require. I simply recognize that all emotion is merely energy and that energy is just energy. There isn't good energy and bad energy.

I feed on energy, as an energy being, so I can feed on anger, sadness, shame, etc. just as well as I can feed on joy -- and now I do. I suck up the energy of my emotions now and have discovered they are all bliss in their true nature once I get past my thoughts about them. Even disgust turns into bliss if you sit with it with gratitude and allow yourself to savor the disgusting quality of it as just pure energy."

I have been doing this "devouring" of not only my emotions, but also my thoughts lately. On separate occasions, I have even converted the energy of a cold virus and a headache back into energy and "devoured" that.

Here I use the metaphor of eating the energy, where at other times you will hear me phrase it in terms of liberating the energy. It just depends on one's point of view. When I am identifying myself as a separate energy being I speak of devouring, taking the energy back into my localized physical self. When I am identifying myself as the infinite unity of all things, my true nature, I speak of liberating the energy so that it once more becomes a free flowing part of that greater ocean. Either way, after being converted back into raw energy it has no separate form and therefore effectively no longer exists as the problematic form it once was.

I am working on ways of teaching this to others to do within themselves and of learning myself to do it within the bodies of other people. I am also using it as a part of my spiritual practice (enlightenment being about the dissolution of the separate self identity and the freedom from a dualistic self-object that comes with that). I will write more about that subsequently.

If you'd like to do some of the work with me, check out my healing work website at www.clearlightnature.com and follow the links to the True Self Attunement. I have begun teaching an adapted form of this method to clients as part of that session, though it isn't the primary focus of the session.

Here is a poem I wrote yesterday that I think does a good job in conveying what I am doing:

Breathing in,
I devour it.
Savoring each breath,
Form returns to emptiness,
Emptiness reveals itself as ecstasy.

I saught you,
Forgetting that I am you.
We are emptiness embracing,
Laughing,
Like water running over rocks,
Children spinning in the sun.

Each thought -
I consume its raw energy.
It is no longer an object
For my love or hate.
There is only one decision left.
Yummm!

Each feeling -
I digest it fully.
No longer running from sorrow,
Disgust, shame, or aggression.
I savor their raw energy
And proclaim the final judgment.
Yummm!

Then suddenly all my feasting ends.
There is nothing left to consume.
I reach for something, but then abondon the pursuit,
Realizing at last
That I have been devouring
Myself.
Aha!

-- Indigo Ocean